they told me, "you come to God. he doesn't come to you."
so i sat.
listened.
believed.
dug my fingernails into my palm and pulsed.
i didn't know why then, but i did.
sometimes it's not a choice
and it's never an easy not a choice to make
breathe
don't
breathe
"you come to God. he doesn't come to you."
hold your breath till you turn blue
and wake up in a spinning heaven
or take deep breaths while you burn in hell
broken
breathing
"why don't you just leave"
i left
i didn't expect God to follow me
i didn't expect a ram to rush forward
i didn't expect to be saved
a voice
"I will not leave you comfortless."
"I will come to you."
