I’m beginning to think
that it was never meant
to be a final goodbye.
I am beginning to feel like
the aperture of mortality
was too tight of a confine
to let the light
all the way in.
I was blinded in
the wake of heavenly
shards of light spilling
from her soul to mine, and
I couldn’t see what
she had once been to me,
but I could feel it.
I can still feel it.
Souls stitched together
with the remnants of
pre-mortal flashes.
Whispers. Laughter.
Colors. Memories.
Only pieces with
no specifications of
how we were meant
to fit together.
I have filled my empty basket
with every last piece.
I left it at His feet,
and watered it with saltless tears.
The salt diluted over
months of prayers.
Months of begging.
Months of fighting
to strip the tethers
I was drowning from
the weight of
an unresolved burden.
Too many questions
were lead pellets
through my body.
Freedom came from
the spiritual gift of another.
Heaven sent healing bursts
that freed me from
the tethers to find
the surface -
To the light.
I can now
find the shore, and
this is where I wait.
I wait for her to find me.
I wait for us to gather
our baskets and to dump
the pieces together.
On the highest point
of the mountain
where the stained glass
refracts prisms
across our faces.
Heads bowed.
Arms folded.
Heaven will help us
find the exact
specifications of how
our souls were meant
to fit together, and
we will maintain
heaven’s wishes
in exactness and honor.
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